Can I get written up for a medical issue?

Can I get my ex boyfriend to help with my medical bills / abortion as it was what he wanted but disappeared?

• Ok this my be long but I need to get my full story out there for those to understand: even pro-lifers. I am one of those people that never believed in abortions and never thought that this would even be an option that I would be facing or considering. I am 31 years old, I have been on birth control for 13 years and I was with my ex boyfriend for over a year and we were living together. My ex has had his share of many issues with alcohol issues, anger issues towards me and to break it down he ruined his ex girlfriend's life before me by crashing her car drunk driving and losing his license. I am an understanding person that people make mistakes and everyone deserves a second chance. I have known him since middle school and I figured that with my help he would get on the right track. Which for the most part he was doing pretty good. However, he began to start drinking again and work wasnt stable for him which led us into a lot of fights because I dont make a lot of money at my job either. We were definetly not getting along and he just could not get his act together financially and maturely for his age. He would rather be out partying then being an adult. So anyways i moved out and took space but then he played some head games with me and said that he was going to fix things and we were going to work things out. So we had a week of greatness which latter I realize he was just usuing me for sex. After this wonderful week he decides that he no longer wants to be with me forever. Then I find out that I am pregnant while on birth control pills. Now, I have a long history of psychiatric disorders and have been on medications while getting pregnant that all my doctors, obgyn and psychiatrist told me that are detrimental to a pregnancy and that I need to be on them (i went off of them when i found out i was pregnant but i had to go back on them). So the doctors said being on them was bad and being off them was bad. They said that they baby may not make it or be deformed. They couldnt say that I NEED an abortion because they could lose their jobs but they were doing a good job with the hinting at it. I am an only child and my parents are alcoholics. I have no support system in place. I work full time and the state would not provide me much assistance at all. The father off the baby said that he realizes that he lives his life stubbornly not taking responsiblity for his actions and doesnt have any intentions of changing. He said that he has no money for child support, no emotional support to give to me or the baby and can not be a father. He said that he would help pay for an abortion then he disappeared. Not to be heard from again and didnt pay a dime. I realize I cant do this on my own with no support from anyone, financially and mentally I can not do it. And most importantly my health is at risk as well as the baby's because of the medications i have been on and continue to be on for my mental health. So I made the decision to go for the abortion pill at planned parenthood they didnt see anything on the ultrasound and made me go to the emergency room who saw the baby and said im 5 weeks pregnant so its really early and i can now go back to planned parenthood for the pill. But now I have all these medical bills and even though i have insurance but it doesnt cover a whole lot and i get paid crap at my job I cant afford all this and he promised to help and then took off. Also, he stole my bed that we had a written agreement on that he was to pay me monthly for and he took off with that and not paying. I can also add that he got evicted from his apartment for not paying his rent because he is too busy partying instead of paying his bills. He is also supposed to go to court next week for his criminal driving case and most likely they are going to suspend his licence for 6 months and he is definetly going on probation for a year to two years. I would bet that he is going to continue to drive with this suspended liscense and continue to drink and drive. I just want something to be done about this guy and I want him to pay for what he did to me, all that he put me through and the money that he promised to pay me. Is there a way I can take him to court for my medical expenses? I am sure I could for the bed issue ... if the court can find him. But what about the medical expenses, does anyone know anything about this?

• Answer:

  This guy sounds like a total selfish jerk. Even so, all these wrongs toward you do not justify the wrong you wish to do to you child. Abortion really would be wrong and a huge mistake. Abortions can indeed sometimes give you physical complications and problems with future pregnancies such as miscarriages being more likely. And a lot of real guilt and shame often can come with an abortion. Perhaps it is for this reason that many relationships end not too long after an abortion is done. Or at least stress is added there. By having that child it is no small aspect that you can go for the rest of your life knowing that you gave that child the chance to live out his or her life. By keeping the baby or putting him/her up for adoption you will choosing life for him or her and you are making a right decision. I strongly counsel do not get an abortion and either keep the baby or look at adoption if you really think you would not want to raise a child at this time. Often with arranged adoptions the adoptive parents can take care of the medical bills and expenses. Don't be too afraid to have a baby - He or she will be a great blessing. You can do it. I have seen poor families in the slums of India raise multiple children who seem to be fine! If you want free over the phone counseling especially about adoption (advice which can be more helpful and personal than the brief answers here) in all this you can call Bethany Pregnancy Services toll free 1-800-238-4269. You have nothing to lose by calling and getting their input and advice and possible help.