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Where can I find information on dealing with a person who has possibly been abused?

• My boyfriend and I just recently started dating and there is a good possibility that he was abused by someone he was close too. He has never come out and officially said anything but he has hinted to it in many conversations we have had about his problems and that he doesn't think that he can ever come out and tell me what is going on or even his psychologist. I'm terrified of this because I am a psychology minor and I see the signs that we have learned about. I have no clue where to find information about how best to deal with this situation and how best to support him. I've never had to deal with this kind of thing before because my family has never had this kind of thing happen other than when I was raped in high school. I have gone through that but I don't think this is quite the same kind of situation. Please help me! I really love this guy and I really need help!

• Answer:

  You can just let him know that it is common for anyone who has been sexually abused by their mom or dad or someone else not to know how , or want to talk about it. You can let him know that the abuse may effect his abilities to relate well to others, like you, and until his mind and feelings are resolved and no longer bother him , it is going to effect any relationship he has. Since each individual is different, there is 'information' everywhere in the different diagnosis ....and info dealing with this is the essense of psychology in practice.........in many situations with clients. You may seek out therapists who specialize in sexual abuse of children and both of you go talk to them.......... I like EFT for removing the trauma experience, to remove it, so you could apply that to your rape experience and to his abuse and see how it goes from there.... Otherwise it is not going to get better, and he should deal with it before he gets involved with someone, what does he expect you to do? Here is a free healing method you can get before march when he retires, i know it works....... I think you should protect yourself until he deals with his trauma, and not expect him to be able to have a normal growing relationship with you or anyone else, until he does. If he is somehow an exception, then , he will still need additional help , more nurturing, and many have some developmental deficits.......or areas that need filling with love and experiences or education.